279193 Reblog

1 hour ago


maybe if you came and fell asleep next to me I wouldn’t be so sad

(via flushthet0ilet)

3570 Reblog

1 hour ago


Spit is 99% water, you shouldn’t be getting this mad, you said you were thirsty

(via flushthet0ilet)

161582 Reblog

4 hours ago


Hand jobs and blow jobs are called jobs because they’re tedious and dicks are gross. Going down on a girl is called eating out because it’s a privilege.

(via d4nnyo)

494 Reblog

4 hours ago




No that’s sorcerers you idiot
209346 Reblog

4 hours ago



sometimes when I’m angry or stressed or sad I think about whales just swimming around in the ocean, doing whale shit. like, they’re the biggest goddamn mammals on the planet. they don’t have time for little problems. there’s too much chill-ass whale shit to do.
basically what I am saying is that whales are my happy place.

that actually calmed me down
127100 Reblog

4 hours ago


you can order 4,500 live ladybugs on amazon for less than $20 what a time to be alive

(Source: 420dongsquad, via fuckyeahlesbianism)

425 Reblog

4 hours ago

1746 Reblog

4 hours ago

27177 Reblog

4 hours ago


I don’t have DNA I’m just made up of billions of tiny Fall Out Boy lyrics

(Source: penceyprepofficial, via derfect-pisaster)

303744 Reblog

4 hours ago


this is hands down the wildest post on this entire site
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